Monday, July 22, 2013


The last personal siting of any of the AssnYne crew that I had was outside of an all ages show that was held at local bar; David had stolen a girl’s keys and was running around the parking lot guffawing like a demented Gogo Dodo. She pouted and it made him laugh, “Hoo-hoo-hoo! WOO-hoo-hoo-hoo!” even harder. ...It’s not that AssnYne are purely goofballs and spend all their time messing with their friends- they mean fucking business when it comes time to rock- but it’s heartening to see that a guy with biceps the size of my head, who could probably intimidate any ol’ schmoe if he wanted to act like a dick and throw his weight around, would rather have fun than pose a threat. Later on, he was playing hackeysack with a crushed can; it got away from him and pegged me right in the side of my head. He howled with laughter but immediately followed it with a, “Sorry about that!” That’s the sort of people that most everyone wants deal with on a daily basis and that’s the spirit of Richard Dreyfest right there, buddy!

Names and roles in the band:
AssnYne! Dustin: Lead/Rhythm Guitar, David: Vocals, Ben: Drums, Spock: Bass/Master Recorder Exploder, Trevor: Lead/Rhythm Guitar.
How long have you guys been ripping out the metal? Would you consider yourselves vets yet?
Assnyne has been around since 2003, that's when the first show was anyway. We've been playing in the local scene with different lineups since that show and there are 2 original members remaining since then however, this is the best lineup we've had, which has lasted since 2009.
That being said, we would consider ourselves somewhat veterans locally.

What’s the recipe for an ASSNYNE?
A Donkey fucking a mule that has mated and inbreeded with Slayer. Add bacon, as is tradition. The baby was aborted and left on the side of the road next to an abandoned meth lab in Lockwood... As is Tradition.

Some of you guys are from Lockwood (a neighboring rural suburb of Billings), right? For some reason, I’ve noticed that Lockwood seems to breed metal more than any other style of it something in the water?
All of us have lived in Lockwood in the past except for Trevor.
and yes, it's the water.

If you weren’t playing the style of music you are now, what sort of stuff would you gravitate to?
Elevator Music! or SciFi!

Montana's most credible Bigfoot sighting.
...and you had him pegged as a B.C. Rich guy.

Television, movies, or internet?

How do you sleep at night?!
With our thumbs and our mouths and our dicks in our butts!

Here’s some well-known lyrics, finish them the way you want:

“Close your eyes/Look deep in your soul/Step outside of yourself/and let your________________.”

"Mind Go"

“All you need is _________, _________, _________ / _________is all you need”

“I’m gonna pop some tags/only got 20 dollars in my pocket/I’m hunting, looking for a come-up/This is_________________.”
"Fucking Gay"

Whatcha doin’ with the band in the upcoming months?
We're making an 3-split-album entitled: "Let's fucking call it Bacon!" with Shangri-La, Tribe & Assnyne (that's us). The recording process is about half way through & we're hoping to release it sometime this year. So, in other words: Gonorrhea!

So that’s that, ladies and joims! Get your bacon fix and catch all three of the bands that’ll be on that split at Dreyfest! If you can’t wait, here’s a sampling of one:
Until next time, watch out for flying cans, guard your car keys, and-

See you at Dreyfest!

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